Alright, so since yesterday, I have just been feeling very insecure and crappy. There are just a lot of things culminating. FYI: I a freshman in college.
-One of my friends got really drunk and had to be sent to the hospital….this is one of my good friends, and she is really upset that she did this, but it just makes me nervous because I really like this group of people, and now she did this
-I am not sure I like another group of friends that much, but I really want to
-My best friend from high school has found her niche and her close group of friends that she really likes, and I just am wondering why I haven’t. I still sometimes quesiton my friendships, I just don’t know how much of a bad thing that is….I guess I am just a little bit jealous of her?
-I have never been in a relationship, gone on a date, or even kissed a boy. For that matter I don’t think any guy has every been attracted to me
-Everytime there is a guy I like, something just goes wrong so that it doesn’t work out.
So I am a very outgoing person, and I generally am happy. I am a talker, and people tend to like me. I am not ugly (not ridiculously pretty). I work hard, and I have a strong set of morals-I try to be the best person I can be. I don’t feel the need to be mean to others, but if someone is outwardly mean to me, I don’t pretend to have time for them/pretend to care about them (this isn’t often). I have 2 really really close friends at home, and my family is very close. I have never felt this insecure before, I was always incredibly happy with my life in high school.
In regards to the boys- I have lots of guy friends, just no one that seem interested in more. I have been told that there is nothing necessarily wrong with me, just that I don’t come off as “available”. I have no clue how to fix this. I just don’t treat boys any differently than I do girls. The conversation is different, but I don’t act differently. Also, in college, I think lot’s of people just want hook-ups, and I am not interested in that. I also refuse for my first kiss to be at a party or antything.
So I guess my questions are:
-What do I do about my friends situation?
-What do I do about the boys situation?
Categorized | Affiliate Marketing 101
Relationship Help! Please?!!!!!?
Posted on December 8, 2010.
You sound like a really nice person. Always remember, you don’t have to change yourself to suit other people. Think about it this way: you’re a rare breed, and there are others like you, but maybe you just haven’t met them yet. Chances are you just come across as a confident person that doesn’t need any more friends, so people don’t go out of their way to get close to you. Therefore, it should be up to you to ask people to hang out, and to make an effort to get close to others. It sounds like people already like you, and if you become more outgoing, then your confidence and mood will rise as well. 🙂
As for your boys situation, it is likely because you aren’t a ditsy bimbo, and you have morals as far as sex goes. If you really want to have a boyfriend, I would suggest “choosing” someone, and making an effort to smile at them and talk to them more often, and flirt a bit. Things should come naturally once you find someone you want to be with. But don’t force it – if there’s no one you’re attracted to, then that’s that, and you should wait until you do find someone. I know it sucks, but boy experience isn’t everything.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k7X7sZzSXYs
You don’t need to have a boyfriend. You don’t have to have those friends. Do what you want, and if you’d like someone to join you… be it male or female, platonic or not… ask. If they say no, enjoy it alone. There’s no shame in that. Just continue to be happy. Don’t let what others are doing or not doing get you down.
Make your own niche.
what you have described was me not long ago.Patience is a virtue, remember? My few friends scattered off into the groups where they fit and i was left standing there. but its a great time for self evaluation and to assess what you really want and decide who you really want to be. it comes with time of course, but exciting time! and the parties? blech. i wouldnt kiss a boy at a party either. with all of the beer flying around it would be hard to know if something like that was genuine. and the hooking up.. how unfortuinate. i thought i would never find a good guy that loved me in return… but i did and we are getting married in march. just be patient and try to stay confident. you are just in a small rut that everyone gets caught in at some point in their lives… When you finally believe in yousrlf enough to know that you can get out of it, you will jump out, not crawl. things will start falling into place if you just stay patient and confident and most importantly stay true to yourself!