Have been with my boyfriend only 4 months. We “moved in” together pretty quickly due to some financial hardships. He is staying at my apartment and paying some of the rent, which I made very clear to him should be a temporary situation.
I am in my late 20’s, have an established career and a furnished apartment I worked very hard for. He is early 30’s, does not have a career (although has a job), and has not really been able to find his niche yet.
It is important for me to be with someone who is established and can stand on their own two feet, as I have. I am wondering if I should just continue living with him and have a “you only live once” mentality…just go for it. OR have him find his own place and establish himself more before “mooching” off me…Thanks!
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When Should You Move In With A Bf?
Posted on May 28, 2013.
living with someone can cause stresses that otherwise wouldn’t happen. I mean how many best friends move in together and then figure out what it is about the other person that annoys them. 4 months isn’t that long, i’d be careful because moving in could actually push you apart. If it were me I wouldn’t move in with a girl until we’ve been dating for over a year and a half– maybe that’s on the other end of the spectrum but thats how I feel.
Also when does the “temporary” period end. You should establish that otherwise the awkward conversation of “so…when are you moving out” will come up. If it is established right away then you could say something like “do you need me to take off work to help you move in a few weeks” or “have you found a place close by yet” What happens if he can’t pay rent because something happens. the lease is in your name so you will have to pay it, and then you and in a situation where your boyfriend owes you money and then it gets awkward asking for it. And he feels like **** because guys feel like they should be supporting the relationship. It could be really fun, it could also be pretty bad. I wouldn’t do it.
Don’t do it. Make him get his stuff together first