Affiliate Marketing Secrets

Is this a good idea?
I have an idea for making a brand new fruit.
I have dubbed a crapple because of the procedure to make it, and it is as follows.
A person who will not be missed, for example a hooker, a hobo, or an illegal immigrant, will be kidnapped and taken to a secret testing facility. Then, my coworkers will knock them out and split open their stomach. We will then insert an an apple, clog the stomach and seal them up. In a few hours, we shall remove the clog, and allow the have digested apple to pass through the gastric tract. It will them be collected, highly dehydrated, void of all sweetness and nutrients, and we will sterilize it.
We plan to mass market these, under a variety of different names and prices, to create competition. We will patent it, and sell licenses dirt cheap, with many loop holes so we can sue for it back.
The name crapple is derived from the words cripple, crap, and apple.
Please do not disregard my idea as foolish or pointless, as I have, in my possession, three. I have not yet eaten any, as I am sort of afraid of what they taste like. I’m assuming it must taste like a dried apple, and that, in my opinion taste awful. I plant to make oranges and pears in this form as soon as I come up with puns for them. If you have any good name ideas, they will be greatly appreciated.
I have constructed a speech for when the crapple is honored as a great supplement for youths, and people are eating them globally. Here it is. “I am honored, today, to be in front of you all. It seems that only yesterday I was pitching my ideas on internet chat boards and yahoo answers, pitching my ideas. Those mods are tough to get around, and as some one with great, radical ideas, I expected to be scoffed at, although the criticism and hate mail hurt. I’d also like to thank the movie, directed by Tom Six, The Human Centipede. Without it’s inspiration, I don’t think I would have bravery to share my ideas. To be honest, I knew my ideas would eventually catch on. It was only a matter of time. After all, wouldn’t you be intriged by something as elusive as a crapple? I would be, even if it were not for the fact I created them. The idea came, for digestive fruit, that is, when I was out side, and the call of nature urged me on. After a particularly painful bowel movement, I realized I had passed a grape. Then it hit me. Literally. An apple hit me on my head, changing my thought process. That is my inspiration and I hope that you too can come up with something as gallant as a crapple. Remember, even if your idea is outlandish, people will buy anything. And if a risky experiment is required, America is rich with hobos, hookers, and illegal immigrants. After all, they aren’t really people. Thank you for your time, and money.”
What is good about the speech and what is bad? Please specify so it can be awesome, because someday, a crapple will be in your house and you’d better be grateful.
Next I’d like to discuss my idea of a peewi. It is basically a kiwi inserted into some ones bladder and left to marinate. The peewi will be much less hazardous to the patient then the crapple, seeing as they do not have not have to be removed, and are simply there to marinate in the urine.
Which idea is cooler, and which would you rather eat?
Is there any puns you can tell me about fruits and vegetables that relate to pee and poop?
Thanks.

Is this a good idea?
I have an idea for making a brand new fruit.
I have dubbed a crapple because of the procedure to make it, and it is as follows.
A person who will not be missed, for example a hooker, a hobo, or an illegal immigrant, will be kidnapped and taken to a secret testing facility. Then, my coworkers will knock them out and split open their stomach. We will then insert an an apple, clog the stomach and seal them up. In a few hours, we shall remove the clog, and allow the have digested apple to pass through the gastric tract. It will them be collected, highly dehydrated, void of all sweetness and nutrients, and we will sterilize it.
We plan to mass market these, under a variety of different names and prices, to create competition. We will patent it, and sell licenses dirt cheap, with many loop holes so we can sue for it back.
The name crapple is derived from the words cripple, crap, and apple.
Please do not disregard my idea as foolish or pointless, as I have, in my possession, three. I have not yet eaten any, as I am sort of afraid of what they taste like. I’m assuming it must taste like a dried apple, and that, in my opinion taste awful. I plant to make oranges and pears in this form as soon as I come up with puns for them. If you have any good name ideas, they will be greatly appreciated.
I have constructed a speech for when the crapple is honored as a great supplement for youths, and people are eating them globally. Here it is. “I am honored, today, to be in front of you all. It seems that only yesterday I was pitching my ideas on internet chat boards and yahoo answers, pitching my ideas. Those mods are tough to get around, and as some one with great, radical ideas, I expected to be scoffed at, although the criticism and hate mail hurt. I’d also like to thank the movie, directed by Tom Six, The Human Centipede. Without it’s inspiration, I don’t think I would have bravery to share my ideas. To be honest, I knew my ideas would eventually catch on. It was only a matter of time. After all, wouldn’t you be intriged by something as elusive as a crapple? I would be, even if it were not for the fact I created them. The idea came, for digestive fruit, that is, when I was out side, and the call of nature urged me on. After a particularly painful bowel movement, I realized I had passed a grape. Then it hit me. Literally. An apple hit me on my head, changing my thought process. That is my inspiration and I hope that you too can come up with something as gallant as a crapple. Remember, even if your idea is outlandish, people will buy anything. And if a risky experiment is required, America is rich with hobos, hookers, and illegal immigrants. After all, they aren’t really people. Thank you for your time, and money.”
What is good about the speech and what is bad? Please specify so it can be awesome, because someday, a crapple will be in your house and you’d better be grateful.
Next I’d like to discuss my idea of a peewi. It is basically a kiwi inserted into some ones bladder and left to marinate. The peewi will be much less hazardous to the patient then the crapple, seeing as they do not have not have to be removed, and are simply there to marinate in the urine.
Which idea is cooler, and which would you rather eat?
Is there any puns you can tell me about fruits and vegetables that relate to pee and poop?
Thanks.

Is this a good idea?
I have an idea for making a brand new fruit.
I have dubbed a crapple because of the procedure to make it, and it is as follows.
A person who will not be missed, for example a hooker, a hobo, or an illegal immigrant, will be kidnapped and taken to a secret testing facility. Then, my coworkers will knock them out and split open their stomach. We will then insert an an apple, clog the stomach and seal them up. In a few hours, we shall remove the clog, and allow the have digested apple to pass through the gastric tract. It will them be collected, highly dehydrated, void of all sweetness and nutrients, and we will sterilize it.
We plan to mass market these, under a variety of different names and prices, to create competition. We will patent it, and sell licenses dirt cheap, with many loop holes so we can sue for it back.
The name crapple is derived from the words cripple, crap, and apple.
Please do not disregard my idea as foolish or pointless, as I have, in my possession, three. I have not yet eaten any, as I am sort of afraid of what they taste like. I’m assuming it must taste like a dried apple, and that, in my opinion taste awful. I plant to make oranges and pears in this form as soon as I come up with puns for them. If you have any good name ideas, they will be greatly appreciated.
I have constructed a speech for when the crapple is honored as a great supplement for youths, and people are eating them globally. Here it is. “I am honored, today, to be in front of you all. It seems that only yesterday I was pitching my ideas on internet chat boards and yahoo answers, pitching my ideas. Those mods are tough to get around, and as some one with great, radical ideas, I expected to be scoffed at, although the criticism and hate mail hurt. I’d also like to thank the movie, directed by Tom Six, The Human Centipede. Without it’s inspiration, I don’t think I would have bravery to share my ideas. To be honest, I knew my ideas would eventually catch on. It was only a matter of time. After all, wouldn’t you be intriged by something as elusive as a crapple? I would be, even if it were not for the fact I created them. The idea came, for digestive fruit, that is, when I was out side, and the call of nature urged me on. After a particularly painful bowel movement, I realized I had passed a grape. Then it hit me. Literally. An apple hit me on my head, changing my thought process. That is my inspiration and I hope that you too can come up with something as gallant as a crapple. Remember, even if your idea is outlandish, people will buy anything. And if a risky experiment is required, America is rich with hobos, hookers, and illegal immigrants. After all, they aren’t really people. Thank you for your time, and money.”
What is good about the speech and what is bad? Please specify so it can be awesome, because someday, a crapple will be in your house and you’d better be grateful.
Next I’d like to discuss my idea of a peewi. It is basically a kiwi inserted into some ones bladder and left to marinate. The peewi will be much less hazardous to the patient then the crapple, seeing as they do not have not have to be removed, and are simply there to marinate in the urine.
Which idea is cooler, and which would you rather eat?
Is there any puns you can tell me about fruits and vegetables that relate to pee and poop?
Thanks.

Is this a good idea?
I have an idea for making a brand new fruit.
I have dubbed a crapple because of the procedure to make it, and it is as follows.
A person who will not be missed, for example a hooker, a hobo, or an illegal immigrant, will be kidnapped and taken to a secret testing facility. Then, my coworkers will knock them out and split open their stomach. We will then insert an an apple, clog the stomach and seal them up. In a few hours, we shall remove the clog, and allow the have digested apple to pass through the gastric tract. It will them be collected, highly dehydrated, void of all sweetness and nutrients, and we will sterilize it.
We plan to mass market these, under a variety of different names and prices, to create competition. We will patent it, and sell licenses dirt cheap, with many loop holes so we can sue for it back.

Hi,
I work as an upholsterer doing to interior of trucks. We do cab and sleeper doors, cab and sleeper roof, wall paneling etc. but not seats.
Over the last few years I’ve had a couple of mates come to me and ask me too trim up new front door and back paneling. One was a classic Mini and the other an EJ Holden. Both as part of restoration projects, but the panels I did were of my own design.
I did both jobs and they were both happy with the results, but the question arose both times and a couple since…Why dont you start you own business doing this?
Im now entertaining the idea. Am thinking small, just me and maybe one other person.
Basically Im thinking of a bit of a niche business that just makes interior door paneling and back paneling for classic cars (50’s – 70’s (holdens, mini’s, vw beetles, etc)). Just paneling, no seats. I will provide flexibility for customers by allowing them to either choose to restore back to original, choose from a set list of my standard designs or design their own. The customer will have complete flexibility and control in design and color and materials etc.
I also know that there are clubs and shows dedicated to cars like the Mini and Classic Holdens in my area, so I know its somewhat popular but just how much I dont know, an I also I figure these would be great places to try and get customers from. If I could show one of my interiors in one of the cars at a show, for example, that would be a great advertisement.
Thats it in a nutshell.
So is there any merit to the idea? Any aspects that should be changed? Or maybe abandon the idea all together if its not workable. At the most basic level, is this workable?
Do you think there would be enough of a market out there for this type of thing?
Im based in Melbourne’s East but would be willing to relocate anywhere in Australia to find the right market.
I have put a lot more detailed thought into certain aspects than the above would indicate but I didnt want to go into too much detail here, Im just floating the general idea because if the general idea doesnt work then the details dont matter.
Dont hold back In your reply’s. Im a grown up, I can take the criticism….but Im asking a question on the internet, Im sure I dont have to state that, haha.

I consider myself completely heterosexual and am in a loving relationship with a woman, but I have always had this attraction to Transsexuals. I’m not just attracted to any transsexual, but ones that look and act more feminine than most women and you would have no idea they had a you know what, unless you saw it. I don’t ever see myself dating a transsexual, nor I don’t really want to hook up with one either. It’s just the thought of being tricked and taken control of that gets my juices flowing. I have massaged my prostate and it does lead to a very intense orgasm. Is that a reason for this attraction? To have a “women” seductively dominate me? To be clear, I am truly disgusted by the thought of kissing or having sex with a male. I just don’t find them attractive. Not even crossdressers. When I masturbate to this niche, I can’t watch any transsexual that I can tell is a male until they take their clothes off. I masturbate to heterosexual porn just as much.
With that said, I don’t consider myself gay, nor would I consider myself bisexual because I am solely turned on by feminine beauty. It just so happens that sometimes I’m turned on with a girl with something extra. Do you have any comments or what do you think I would be considered? Thanks for the replies.
I’m looking for genuine opinions and not “your a total fag” comments. I don’t tolerate anyone who offends people for their own satisfaction.