Affiliate Marketing Secrets

Here’s what I’m after:
An out-of-the-box web application that would allow me to create a set of questions that points a potential buyer to the product(s) they’re looking for?
If there isn’t such a beast, I’d also be into the following:
An application that displays a table which can be sorted and filtered on-the-fly to the users’ preferences.
Here’s my scope:
I have a website for niche enthusiasts, and I want to help my visitors, who are new to the niche, find products that are best suited for them (trying to make an interactive first-time gun buyers guide). The list of products is roughly 200, and will easily grow to 500, spanning over 20 different product feature characteristics (currently 20 columns in an Excel spreadsheet).
If there’s something out-of-the-box that meets what I’m after, I’d be happy to pay for it, but free is always nice. I have very limited programming experience, but if there’s an open source application that I could tweak, I’d be willing to grab a book, and figure it out.
Note: If you have an application in mind, but it’s a plugin/extension exclusive to a specific CMS, please let me know. I’m currently building the site on WordPress, but I’m flexible if it fits what I’m after.
Sorry ahead of time for the broad, abstract question; it’s one of those things I don’t quite know how to Google (I mean Yahoo) for. Thanks in advance.

My significant other and I are looking to aquire a very niche interactive T-shirt for LoZ geeks and gamers alike– It features a string of six hearts that light to full charge when the wearers are nearby, and reverts to a meagre two and a half hearts when they are apart. If you haven’t already gathered it, it’s a couples shirt. :3
http://news.cnet.com/8301-17938_105-9863274-1.html
The aforementioned URL links to the interactive shirt. It’s no longer available via it’s launch site, Thinkgeek.com. It’s not that it’s out of stock: it would simply say, “out of stock,” if that were the case. It’s nowhere to be found. I’m wondering if any of you have any idea as to how I can aquire a set of these magnificant specimens, either by tracking down the order from the orgininal creator or a parent specialty site, or maybe the email or phone line I can use to get more information.

I wanted to make a directory so my customers could find affiliated stores across the country. What is the best way to do this.