Affiliate Marketing Secrets

Okay this situation is very complicated.
I been with my boyfriend since 2008, and since we started dating, the relationship started to progressively get worse and worse. The first year of our relationship was kind of perfect, but within the second year, I always found out that he talked to his ex over the phone, text messages, e-mail etc. He’d always flirt with other women, have secret friendships with girls and hide everything from me. However if I talk to one guy I get criticized. In the relationship, he constantly belittled me saying I would never find anyone else who will love me, judging my appearance, my mannerisms — basically always implying negative **** towards me.
So, during my first year in college, my boyfriend and I kept arguing and decided to take a break. I met this guy who was the epitome of perfection. He was a sweetheart, educated, handsome, and whenever we spoke there was never a dull moment. We talked and went on “dates” for a month, and I eventually told him I couldn’t see him because I was still affiliated with someone else.
Over the course of two years, him and I still spoke, maybe on 3 occasions. I started to see him randomly where I live, and I finally decided to message him again. He works right near my house and while shopping, I ended up in the store he works. Speaking to him I felt all the emotions I had towards him in 2010 to still be existent. I don’t know how to feel, what to think, I have no one to talk to about this situation.
I love my boyfriend but not romantically, I just feel comfortable. I don’t know what to do, I don’t know what to do or how to feel. Any advice would make me feel at ease