Affiliate Marketing Secrets

But I don’t know how to get it published.
Like I have:
1. My pastor is the official spokesperson for the 700 club, so he the host for a show that has about 10 – 20 million viewers each day but I have a distant relationship with him because I am not a very strong Christian.
2. I have an uncle who does acupuncture and 3 of his regular clients are billionaires. He is also affiliated with a very well known basketball player… but my uncle doesn’t trust me.
3. I have a cousin in China who makes 100 000 dollars a day hosting talks on the psychological benefits of Bhuddism… and if I want, I can get her to translate my books into chinese since Chinese has 2 billion people right now… However, in China, a lot of people plagiarize and sell books on the black market without giving any credit to the authors.
4. I have an aunt who owns a law firm in China, that employs 25 lawyers, and she does big cases like famous murder trials and things like that… but she is probably way too busy to help me patent this book idea
5. My ex-best friend’s ex-boyfriend’s cousin is a billionaire but her ex-boyfriend has very little confidence in me and my ex-best friend won’t help me unless I give her something in return
6. My long term friend from kindergarten does motivational speeches for a living but I’ve lost his contact information and I don’t think my father will give it to me because he hates me. However, he makes about 100 000 dollars a week.
7. I have a cousin who goes to wharton business school. She has a mastor’s from there and has about 200 friends from the University of Pennsylvania and more specifically from Wharton and Wall street, and even though she doesn’t like me very much, she has faith in my writing ability and might help me if she thinks the book will sell, because then I can make her look good, and she can brag about me to her friends.
8. I know a couple of rich guys who make about 500 – 600 000 a year and might be able to convince them to pay for the publication of my book, but these guys are extremely popular with about 60 – 80 people chasing after them and wanting to be their “Friend.”
Those are all the connections I think I can pull at the moment, unless I know some others that are currently not aware of me…
I could try to publicize on my own without using the connections I’ve been given and that’s the route I want to take and plan on taking… I don’t know what to do.