Affiliate Marketing Secrets

I don’t know what to do! For these past few months at night, while I’m listening to the BBC, as I will do at home, because I like schedules, and suddenly the urge to convert to christianity will overcome me.
As far as I’m able to deduce, it is possible that as opposed to pressing a Carrier in law, I am to forgo law school and attend seminary instead.
I love history and I am a political science major. I know next to nothing about religion.
When I was a little younger, like 17, I wanted to be a minister. My nickname was the most high reverend and I would do funny things like bless people at debate tournaments. Now 7 years later I find myself wanting to embrace god again. The only reason I don’t do that is because I wouldn’t be sure what to do the next day. As in ‘what are the rules I would follow?” Type thing. I also have no social support, at all, because I’ve lost all of my friends since I was 17. I live with my parents and am a 2.5 gpa student, not spectacular. Also, I’m very shy and I”m not so sure what kind of a minister I would make because I’m not good in group settings Although I am a master orator. So, in conclusion, I don’t know is this the normal process by which god calls one to the ministry? What do I do next? Why would god call me?

Knowing that some readers would instantly jump to conclusions, I’m listing the following factors first:
1) I am only attracted to a very particular niche (unfortunately attraction is biological and there is nothing I could do to change this)
2) most girls see me as long term material the very first sight they see me (not trying to be arrogant here, but it’s true and oftentimes I wish it wasn’t)
3) I do not chase and I do not conform to play hard to get (to be fair, if I was sadistic enough, I would manipulate the situation so that they would chase me, so don’t get me started; and if they pester me enough about it, thinking it’s the only way the guy is interested or they are being selfish and get the guy to unnaturally become submissive, I would be more inclined to throw her/them out). Having said that, I don’t care who makes the first move, so long one of us does.
4) I uphold ethics and principles such that if she is looking for something completely different to what I am, e.g. I am considering whether she is someone I would date vs she thinking I am long term material, it’s no game and I break it off
5) I do not want people to change themselves because of me, because it seems fake and, if they put up with it over the long term, they could easily get depressed
6) I cannot stand shy girls i.e. can’t even talk to them properly or even be able to befriend them. (To be fair, they are too tensed to say anything properly to me and we keep getting moments of awkward silence anyway.)
7) I also reject girls on un-lady like behaviour and offensive remarks/assault (this is different from teasing). This would include manipulation and outright stupidity.
My mindset is to go out there and meet someone by chance and convenience. Having said that, I do ask friends for help and I do put myself on dating sites (no luck in either cases).
I go out to find women I am interested in and if we happen to click and look for the same thing. We go on a coffee date of some sort to know each other more (no romance involved until we are more familiar i.e. not point unless it’s genuine). If we do not naturally click, look for the same thing, or both, it’s game over and I move on. Ditto, if she violates any of the conditions stated above. No second chances.
Unfortunately the 7 conditions above will not change and do not change (trust me, I’ve tried it many times).
It’s not that I like sticking to a type, but I tend to feel very little, if any, attraction for anyone outside the niche.
From what you can tell, is there anything I am doing that is holding me back (other than the 7 conditions) or whether my mindset is a bit ‘off course’.
Cheers

I’m obviously confused. I am Mexican, and I hate Mexican people, lol. I am in fact of Spanish decent. But the people affiliated with my family, I don’t think are. How weird is this?
I think Mexicans are incompetent and should go back to their own country and fix it themselves. I think they are uneducated cowards for coming here. Coming here for productivity is one thing, but coming here because you can’t find any lawn mowing jobs in Mexico is sad. They need to try getting an education for once, I’m pretty sure people in Mexico remain with the intelligence of a 4th grader.

In a few days time I shall be standing in front of class to give a talk on meanders. A perfectly harmless but rather uninspiring piece of fluvial bubblegum. In the cutthroat world of classroom politics how can I make a lasting impression and stand out from the crowd?
While I don’t give a damn about what grade I get, out of respect for my teacher I shall adhere to the factual requirements imposed upon me. Nonetheless that shan’t prevent me from delivering my talk in a wildly inappropriate and downright weird tone.
This is something of a niche for me, having made a name for myself with frankly ludicrous acts of rebellious intellectualism in French comprehensions(a soul stirring rendition of Allen Ginsberg’s Howl, a melodramatic dissection of the ups and downs of the cursed Kennedy clan and pompous lectures on child psychology).
I understand that my aforementioned “antics” may be hard to grasp and I would like to clarify that while ridiculous and largely irrelevant they are not random outbursts. I have merely taken it upon myself to interpret the French text, which varies greatly, in a unique way. Our answers to this part of the comprehension are in English not in French by the way.
Alas on this occasion I am struggling to think of something inventive. Any strange but linkable topics would be appreciated(remember my talk is on meanders). Likewise any suggestions on how exactly to perform it would be kindly received. I thought about doing it in a sickeningly enthusiastic tone but fear that would be more annoying than anything else, not to mention rude.
Thankyou